I've done ecstasy about 15 times in my life- the first 10-12 times were AMAZING, life changing, positive experiences (no exageration)....everything was beautiful...
...Then, I took some tested, confirmed mdma tabs at an event and experienced a "come up" of EXTREME anxiety, a sense of despair, severe nervousness...I eventually felt "leveled out", and a little bit peaceful and happy, but it was extremely mild and not anything as bright and happy and euphoric as before....I dropped my usual amount of pills (about 3-4)...
I took 3 months off, and then the next experience was similar...a come up of anxiety, a lack of feeling "at place" no matter where I went, and then a mild, slightly more pleasant roll.
...Then I take some "molly" powder (confirmed legit, pure mdma) on my birthday, and have a similar but not as bad experience....I felt like I was "checked out" for the evening, unable to really have fun...but I rolled a bit for a couple hours. Granted, I didn't have much...but still.[size:11pt]Has mdma "stopped working the same" for anyone?
Is there a way of getting intense pleasure out of it again?
Has anyone experienced extreme anxiety and a sense of despair and fear when they take a pill?
I have friends who have severely abused MDMA and still roll like it's their second time....but I feel like for some reason, my brain chemicals have started responding differently to MDMA- not a resistance, but almost like an opposite effect. Any advice?
I had some really beautiful realizations that made my mind truly open up and prioritize the right things and people in my life- maybe thats what I'll get to take out of the few experiences I've had, but I'd really love to continue being able to roll every now and then and have a great time with it again.